Tuesday, 23 April 2013


This month has been exceptionally busy for me. It's been nice travelling and meeting so many people, but it's also been exhausting. I've had to make lots of small talk which was so tiring especially at my sister's birthday dinner. She is so bubbly and outgoing and all her friends are pretty much the same. After a while, I just stopped and sat in a corner and people watched. It was pretty entertaining watching them all.
I'm glad to be home, but I'm out again this weekend for another birthday do, but it's in my city, so no travelling. I can't wait for next weekend when I can just have a lie in, get some school work done and read a book. I read two books this past two weeks. One was 'The last templar' by Raymond Khoury. Good read. It's sort of similar to Dan Brown's 'The lost symbol'. I've not been to my local library in a while. I'm going to pay them a visit soon.

Apparently, I annoyed someone-A. He was going back to Nigeria and my mum had gotten somethings she wanted to send back home and the plan was that another friend of mine, B will pick them up from A and give them to the people they were intended for. My mum asked me to tell A that B will come pick it up from him. I sent A a message saying, please, this is B's number. Can you call him and try to set up a time with him so he knows when you'll be home and he can come pick up the things from you. A says okay first and then a few minutes later, sends me another message saying no. I'm like err, why? He says nothing and that I should call B myself and tell him. I ask him why because it makes more sense for him to call B since he's in Nigeria and it'll cost me to call B from the UK. He's still insistent and I keep on asking why and he tells me in other words that I disrespected him by asking him to do something. I'm like woah. Come again and he repeats himself. He adds that I'm younger than him and a woman and I'm sending him on errands and that I have become too westernised and I should try that in Nigeria and he's just going on and on. I was literally in shock. If this was someone else telling me this, I would not be bothered, but A is like my person. We're really good friends and could have been more if not that he moved back to Nigeria.
All I could think of was so within a week of you back in Nigeria, your mentality has changed so much or wth is going on... I was gobsmacked to say the least and I just could not get my head around the fact that I ask a REALLY good friend of mine who is just about 4/5 years older than me to do a favour for me and it is disrespect. He said that if I had said my mum asked me to tell him, it would have been better, but me asking him was wrong and if I cannot try it in Nigeria.
Is that true?
We've talked a couple of times since that conversation, but it has been strained. I don't know how to relate with him anymore. When we talked and hung out, I never really thought about age and the fact that he was older. We were cool, laughed and insulted each other so I've still been in a state of not shock, but something close to it for the past two weeks. I keep on hoping he'll call or send me a message saying, 'I was joking o! Did you actually take that seriously?' I know he won't, because I had to be sure he said that and so I rang him and he was actually getting angry. He said he's trying to not get too angry because he knows I didn't grow up in Nigeria much so I'm not used to how things are done. That pretty much told me that he was serious, BUT, WTH!!!

I have always been friends with older people all my life and I have pretty much dated mostly guys older than I am, but now, I've had to have a re-think. I know not every guy is hung up on the I'm older than you so you have to kneel down when greeting me even whilst dating or married thought, but I'm so wary.
I would never have thought in a million years that A will spew up the rubbish he did about me being younger and a woman, but he did. I guess, we never really know anyone.
I guess I'm just going to have to deal with it and err...
...Moving on


  1. A just showed you his true personality, he has been coding all these while...Nigerians and the I am older than you complex.

    Glad to know you are good...enjoy your life biko

    1. He did and boy am I glad he did. Better now than later eh?
      It is culture I guess, but I would say that to me anyway, most people in this 'younger' generation who harp on about it probably have self confidence so they DEMAND the respect and most times without giving reason to be respected.
      I don't know though sha. Whatever their reasons, God dey.
      Life goes on.

      Ta. I will. You too :-)

  2. Don't stress yourself about it jere. At least now you now know who he really is. He is apparently narrow minded but please not all men are like that although the society pretty much encourages patriarchy.
    For you though, lesson learnt

    1. I've decided not to :-)
      Sucks that our society does. It's so 19th century :D :P

      I guess change will come. It'll probably be a tad bit slow as change and almost everything else is with us Nigerians.

      Thanks :-)

  3. Don't mind the yeye fellow jare, sometimes people get hung up on non-issues mcheeeewwww

    1. Abi o! Non-issues. There are more important things to be hung up on than "I'm older than you"...
      Oh well.

      Thanks for commenting. :-)


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